Who says big dogs can’t be lap dogs? While German Shepherds might not exactly fit in your lap, they certainly think they belong there! Their loving, affectionate nature often surprises people who think of them only as serious working dogs.
In this article, we’ll share the top 7 reasons why German Shepherds are true lap dog champions—whether or not they can squeeze into your space. Prepare to see your large, lovable Shepherd in a whole new light!
1. They Have No Concept of Personal Space
German Shepherds seem to have missed the memo about their size. These gentle giants genuinely believe they’re tiny puppies who can fit anywhere – especially on your lap.
Their favorite pastime? Finding creative ways to squish their 75-pound bodies into the tiniest spaces possible, particularly if that space happens to be your personal bubble. They’ll contort themselves into pretzel-like shapes just to achieve maximum contact with their favorite human.
Whether you’re working at your desk, watching TV, or trying to enjoy a peaceful meal, your German Shepherd will find a way to make themselves part of the equation. They’ve perfected the art of the slow creep – starting with just a paw or a nose, until suddenly you find yourself completely enveloped in fur.
2. They’re Professional Heat-Seeking Missiles
If there’s one thing German Shepherds excel at (besides being adorable), it’s their uncanny ability to detect and monopolize any source of warmth. Your lap just happens to be their favorite heating pad.
These furry thermometers will track down the coziest spot in the house, which invariably turns out to be wherever you’re sitting. They’re particularly skilled at identifying when you’re wearing your favorite black pants or most expensive outfit – those are apparently the best times for a cuddle session.
Rain or shine, summer or winter, your German Shepherd firmly believes that body heat should be shared. Their dedication to this cause is truly impressive, even if it means you’ll need to invest in a good lint roller.
3. They’re Masters of the Guilt Trip
German Shepherds have perfected the art of emotional manipulation through their expressive eyes and dramatically floppy ears. They’ve weaponized their cuteness to ensure maximum lap time.
One look from those soulful brown eyes, and you’ll find yourself making room on your lap, even if it means contorting yourself into uncomfortable positions. They’ve mastered the head tilt, the gentle paw tap, and the soft whimper – a triple threat that’s nearly impossible to resist.
Your protests about their size will be met with increasingly pitiful expressions until you finally give in. It’s not uncommon to hear German Shepherd owners justify their squished state with phrases like “But look at that face!” or “She just looks so comfortable!”
4. They’re Incredibly Skilled at Finding Loopholes
German Shepherds are renowned for their intelligence, and they put those smarts to good use when it comes to lap-sitting privileges. They’re experts at finding creative solutions to the “too big for lap” problem.
If your lap seems full? They’ll just rest their head there. Need to work? They’ll only put their front half on your lap. Running out of space? They’ll balance precariously on the edge of your chair, defying both gravity and logic.
These problem-solvers will find ways to make themselves fit that would impress a geometry professor. Their determination to achieve lap dog status is matched only by their creativity in making it happen.
5. They’re Convinced They’re Emotional Support Animals
Every German Shepherd seems to believe they’ve been specially trained as a therapy dog, particularly when it comes to providing emotional support through extensive physical contact.
They have an uncanny ability to sense when you’re feeling down and will immediately prescribe their tried-and-true treatment: becoming a 90-pound weighted blanket. Their preferred method of delivery is usually direct lap application.
These self-appointed therapists are convinced that personal space is overrated and that the solution to any problem is more cuddles. Their dedication to your emotional well-being is truly heartwarming, if somewhat crushing.
6. They’re Expert Time Managers
German Shepherds have an impressive internal clock when it comes to scheduling lap time. They seem to know exactly when you need to get up and do something productive – that’s precisely when they’ll decide to make themselves most comfortable on your lap.
They’re particularly skilled at timing their lap sessions to coincide with important phone calls, urgent deadlines, or when you really need to use the bathroom. Their ability to become instantly heavier when you try to move them is nothing short of miraculous.
The guilt of disturbing their peaceful slumber is often enough to make you reconsider your entire schedule. After all, how important is that meeting really?
7. They’re Natural-Born Optimists
Perhaps the most endearing quality of German Shepherds is their unwavering optimism about their lap dog status. No amount of evidence will convince them that they’re too big for your lap.
They maintain an admirably positive attitude about fitting into spaces clearly designed for much smaller dogs. Their confidence in squeezing onto a tiny ottoman with you is truly inspirational.
Each attempt to claim lap space is approached with the same enthusiasm as the first, regardless of how many times they’ve nearly tipped over your chair. Their persistent belief in their lap dog destiny is both heartwarming and slightly concerning.
Take Home Message
While German Shepherds might not be the most practical choice for lap dogs, their determination to claim that title is absolutely endearing. Their combination of size, intelligence, and complete disregard for spatial awareness creates a uniquely charming package that’s hard to resist.
These gentle giants remind us that sometimes the best things in life don’t make perfect sense. Their lap dog aspirations might defy logic, but they certainly make life more interesting – and significantly furrier.
So the next time your German Shepherd attempts to claim their spot on your lap, remember: you’re not just providing a seat, you’re helping them live their best lap dog life. Just make sure to keep a spare lint roller handy and perhaps invest in a sturdier chair!